SADIE MAE is here!!!!

i just got back from closer at the kelly's house!! everybody watching some football...cept for me, morgan, khira, taylor, andye, and jake...

you know, the football-hating loners! lol.

just to let ya know...we have the best life group ever!! made up of the best people ever...minus a few who aren't here yet. lol.

:)

AND!!!!!!!

today i got a new cousin!!!!!!!!!!!

her name is sadie mae and she is the most mellow baby i ever saw. at least for the little while i got to be up there. (15 min.) lol. she looks exactly like her proud big sis sophie ann. ah...i love new borns. (especially when i can give them back when i'm done. unlike the last few babies in my family. jk.;)

welcome to the world, sadie mae!

elevate!!!!!!!!!!!

the first elevate class is tomorrow night!!! i'm so pumped!!

we had our retreat this weekend...
it was amazing!!

we went to st. judson retreat center (?) around the st. francisville area...
oh my goodness...!! i loved it there.

i could share about 50 pages of what God spoke to me while we were there and about the awesome people i got to hang out with...

i'll try to pick my top 3 experiences:

1. okay...well. in all honesty, i've been kinda bummed that i'm not doing full time this year. i don't know. there's a few reasons why (none really worthy of my bummed outness.) a lot of it has to do with my friends who are in full time right now. i wanted to be a part of it with them. and also the fact that i was so close to doing it...i am just too young to move out right now. that bothered me! lol.

when i got to the annex friday before we left for the retreat, i realized that all te people in evening elevate are business people or parents or even grandparents. (i love them all!! don't get me wrong!!:) i really believe i can learn a lot from them.) but i felt a little lost and out of place. i started to get worried and wondered if i could really do it...

when we got to the retreat center...i sat down in the sanctuary before the service started and i felt God tell me, "you're doing this for Me- for My Kingdom. not for your own pleasure and comfort. not to hang out with your friends. not to feel good about yourself. I have planned this for you. you had nothing to do with it. so trust Me. will you give Me your all? will you do your best? will you do it for those who aren't here yet?"

slap!

so yeah that changed my perspective a bit! lol.

2.
oh goodness...what can i pick. i think i'll cram a few things in on this one.
well..i got to hang out with just some of those people- you know what i mean? just some great, inspiring people... to name a few : kristina blunt, lauren shaw, shayna buyers (i think that's her last name), kelly finnagin, and a bunch of others!

also, during the retreat, everyone had solitude time for about 2 hours. i had an awesome time. normally i'm not an outdoors type of person...but i'm trying to get in the hippie flow (displace me started it all). anyway, >sarah< had shown me this really amazing spot cleared out in the woods. just a little area of ground encircled with trees. i plopped my messenger bag down under my head and just laid in all the dead leaves and stared into the sky. it was so peaceful. i just sat there and admired the nature around me.

the night before, elton said something in his worship that stuck out to me. it was something like "i want to feel tiny in your presence". i feel like God has been showing me that i depend on myself too much. i put way too much pressure on myself to be super spiritual and i end up not looking to Him. i act like i'm mature enough to handle things on my own...and i felt God remind me to realize my dependency on Him. He told me that i can't ever grow up. i must always be a child before Him. i can't lose my sense of dependency and helplessness, my need of His protection, my thirst for His approval, my fear of His commands. i must feel small in His presence. i have to be in such awe of His power. i'm just a baby girl. (james 4:10 "when you bow down before the Lord and admit your dependence on Him, He will lift you up and give you honor" and job 25)

so while i was looking up at the creation around me, i thought of God's power and how big He is...

i saw a hawk circling about 500 ft. above me (he must've thought i was dead or something :P) and it really did make me realize how small and incapable i am. that hawk was so far above me...at that moment it saw so many things that were going on that i couldn't see. i was just a speck of his view of the ground below.

i was so humbled.

3.
ok...the last service of our retreat, pastor timmy straight spoke. he is always amazing! i really love and respect him so much. he has something so genuine about him. his message was about finding your calling and clinging to it!

after the sermon, while we were all at the altar...pastor timmy called a few people out and gave them some prophetic word. i was one of them!
(i got so excited...you know how you always hope someone will call you out and tell you something about your life, but it hardly ever happens. lol. yes, i'm a dork)
anyway...
he told me that he kept scanning the crowd and scanning the crowd...and he stopped at me each time. he said that he saw my grandfather and all the missions work he does and he saw my dad and all the stuff he does at hpc...he said that sometimes i fade behind them. people don't see me. i kind of tend to blend in behind their shadows. but he said that God has set me apart. i won't follow either my dad or grandfather...i won't do the same things they are doing. he said people are going to stop just calling me dan's daughter...but soon they will notice me and say who is this girl. i'll be tori. he said that he knows i'm a pray-er. i don't depend on my daddy to pray me through stuff. i seek God for myself. he said God has something special planned for me.

WOW!! how crazy and awesome is that?!!
brittany olivier and i were just talking a few minutes before the service about how we both have family on staff at hpc and that sometimes we don't say our last names when we introduce ourselves to people. lol.

the funny thing is...i've never been bothered by it. honestly, (this is gonna sound bad but...) sometimes i like it. i guess that's why pastor timmy had to share it. i have to be sure not to just depend on my family's reputation and deeds and calling to live. i could easily just coast on what they're doing. but i have to seek and reach for myself.

however, i will always be thankful for the legacy i am a part of. yet another thing God had shown to me bofore this service was the huge advantage i am at. pastor timmy asked if anyone had felt deprived of their childhood to a point that they didn't know how to have a child like faith before God. and at that moment, i realized how amazingly blessed i am to never have to feel that way. my family has poured so much into my life. i mean seriously, i am 16 years old and i'm already starting a course that will prepare me for a life of full time ministry. there is absolutely no way i would be here if i didn't have my parents, grandparents, great-grandparents before me sharing their wisdom and lives with me.

i truly am so thankful for the family i get to be a part of.

...

so that's that.
the retreat was absolutely incredible.
i surrendered so many things to God there.
i dedicated my life time to serving Him...(while i was outside in that little spot in the middle of the trees) i imagined growing old with God at my side. i pictured myself old and gray looking back on a life time spent serving Him- no matter where or what dangers i face...no matter what challenges...i will serve Him all the days of my life.

(like that >brooke fraser< song, "You'll still be the One i want". she says something like "When the years are showing on my face
And my strongest days are gone
When my heart and flesh depart this place
From a life that sung your song"

You'll still be the one I want"

i'm so excited so start elevate. i want to soak up all the knowledge and wisdom i can. i want to give it my all...with a spirit of excellence.

thank you to everyone who is praying for me and to everyone who has sent money this summer. i thank God for all of you!
thanks for helping me grasp the calling God has for me.
love you guys!

-tori

la story

i have to share this experience i had in la.

this is what i wrote in my journal about it...it's really rough and some details may be left out or unclear...but it's still amazing!! :)...

Yesterday I read isaiah 61:6 and matthew 6:20-21…about storing up your treasures in Heaven and how we will be ministers of God that will be fed on the treasures of the nations. I also thought about how we will face Jesus one day and that for everything we do for Him, we will be able to lay a treasure (crown/ jewel) at His feet. I started thinking about how people are God’s passion- they are His treasures. I really believe that the treasures we will lay at His feet will symbolize the people that we lead to Him.
So with that mindset, (last night) we went to skid rowe. (10pm-12am) As I looked at all of those people and saw them as God’s treasures yet living so far and ignorant of who He is. It broke my haert to see God’s most prized possessions living in conditions where their blankets are plastic bags and their entire homes are either cardboard- or nothing at all. Rats running on top of their bodies as they sleep. God’s beautiful treasures…

Today we went on the adopt-a-block outreach. Our group went out and picked kids up and brought them to a local park. At first I was kind of disappointed because there weren’t many kids with us for me to connect with (one on one). But after about 20 minutes I met a girl who was 11 years old. She was so beautiful. (dressed nicely, too.) We began to talk about anything and everything. She told me that she lives with her muslim grandfather but goes to her grandmother’s house on weekends. The grandmother takes her and her brother to a Christian church. Their mom just “passed” and she also told me- with tears in her eyes- that her dad has been in jail since she was one month old. She tried to write to him before, but he had been moved to another place. As she fought back from crying, I asked her if she was okay…she said yes and then moved on to another subject. We continued to talk about a lot of other stuff. I got to buy her and her grandmother some powerade. And right before we left the park, I gave her my small pink Bible and told her to read it and to think about me when she did. I told her I loved her.

Her name was Diamond…

title of post

oh my goodness!!

so much to post!!!!

this week my whole family went to disney world!! it was a blast. one of the best people watching places ever!!!! seriously...that's all you can really do when you're in a two hour line. but there really were some pretty awesome/interesting/weird people. so many different nationalities. i loved hearing little kids with english accents. that was the best!!
so i got to do my all time favorite hobby in disney world! if i couldn't have done anything else- just sitting and observing people would have been good enough. lol.

i hope i don't sound too weird. haha.

other than that...
jd and i rode our first roller coaster while we were there! oh yes...we are poor little, sheltered, yellow bellied chickens. lol. but somehow we worked up the guts...

lincoln and the babies loved everything. of course, lincoln had to get all the characters autographs and pictures. :)

the babies absolutely loved riding the tea cups. and they got some plastic pirates swords to poke everyone with in the car ride home. so lovely!

i think everyone enjoyed themselves. my calves feel as big as pumpkins though.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

on our way back from disney world, jordan texted me asking if i was going to the student ministries leaders retreat that night.(last night)

i had completely forgotten about it. i didn't sign up or pay or anything...

but the one and only lauren best worked it out for me to go...
so i met up with jason and jennifer and rode with them to the ambassador hotel in NO.
(by the way...riding with them was so much fun. i really believe that we have THE best youth pastors on the face of the earth! just to let ya know! they are so amazing...seriously!!)

the retreat was great. i needed to be refreshed. a week in disney will cause you to lose your Christianity! lol. jk.
but i really did need to just sit in God's presence and fill up...
pator mike and pastor johnny had some awesome stuff to share.

i had a great time. we got to eat at cafe dumonde and pj's (almond croissant!! and ginger peach tea) and rani's cafe (pesto crusted chicken sandwich and gen sing lemon tea!!).

now i am so beyond exhausted...!

i have at least one more story i have to post from LA.
soon.

okey dokey...
my eyes hurt. the computer is damaging my optical and cranial nereves.

if i don't post again soon...beat me upside the face. k?

:)

just in case i don't get to post tomorrow...which i probably won't...

august 2 is a big day!!!

it's both my uncle josh and aunt shannon's birthday!!
and it's also the day i first got my blog! 2 years ago!!
(guess it's time for a wordpress...lol.)

this was my first post. haha. :


hi

my name is tori ohlerking. i am fourteen years old and i go to healing place church. i just got back fom our youth group summer camp called submerge. God's presence was so thick. our guest speaker, chad daniels, said that it was like yogurt. :-) he only got to speak two messages out of the four days we were there, because God took over. it was amazing. that week i had been dealing with a lot of doubt, but by the last day God had proven Himself to me in so many ways. i was also told that i was going to be an intercessor. camp was an awesome experience that i will never forget. God moved everyone there- saved and not saved. gtg.

*vicTORIa*

(>leah< was the one who told me i was gonna be an intercessor. i didn't even really know her then. how awesome is that?!! she's #1)

"why are you living such a blessed life? why do you know who God is...why have you been so privileged to experience His presence over you so strongly...when there are so many people how have no clue what that shelter is. they have never sensed the confidence that you find in God's arms. They will never know His peace! They are being buried half alive...their bells are ringing...and yet you stand there. you're safe in God's arms. You know Him as your everything. He is your security. but a security that is not meant to be secure- nor is it meant to be comfortable. look at this dying world! God certainly did not allow you to know Him to the extent that you do, only for you! You must share it! how can you stand there in that shell of yours and be so warm and cuddled up...without a disturbance in your soul for the people around you...the people who are not only going to hell but they are living in it now!! you have been chosen to know your God. He chose You! but don't ever just sit there in pride and be content to know Him- when there are millions of lost sheep who never will know Him unless you become selfless and take a stand- unless you open your eyes to what's unseen!"

in LA, these thoughts kept revolving in my head. they rung so loudly...i could barely get through any outreach without crying. honestly, i didn't understand why i wasn't the one living on skid rowe. i couldn't shake the thoughts of "i should be here". i almost felt sick! it just didn't make sense that i should be the one with God's love dwelling in me- that i didn't even have to fight for it to be there, really...when these people have never even had a chance. it was not just humbling- but humiliating. i felt so unqualified and selfish.

God is the only one who knows why He chose me. and i really don't get it. i honestly feel sick to think about how much i take knowing Him for granted- how much i just don't do anything about it. i act like i'm living for me...but "like Jesus, i belong to the world, living not for myself- but for others." why is it so hard to get a grasp of?

Leah reminded me an incredible verse she found...Proverbs 31:8 & 9: Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;
ensure justice for those being crushed.
Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless,
and see that they get justice.

a few weeks ago at prayer, i tried something weird. normally when we pray it's, "God touch so and so....but this time i prayed as if i were that person (i'm sure im not the only one who's ever done that...but it's new to me. lol.)
but it gave me such a new perspective. i know i;ll never fully understand what some people are going through...but praying as if i were them- it puts a whole new twist on it.

then i read that verse. "speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves."
God chose us...to be their voices. we are to cry out as if we, ourselves, are them. we are to feel their hurts so strongly in our hearts that we cry out. we have to be their voices. they can't speak! so we have to be the ones. if we don't cry out- then the rocks will!!!

and you know it's bad if God has to start using rocks as His pleaders!

we've got to start crying out. it's not our own voices we are using- it's theirs.



so there's a good long post.
i have so many more things to tell about LA.
one really awesome thing in particular.
soon...

hm..i might just post all ten pages of word documents i journaled. ? ;)

...


-tori